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Should I take him out now?

 
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vmsgirl71
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Joined: 14 Apr 2009
Posts: 25
Location: Waterford, MI

PostPosted: Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:27 am    Post subject: Should I take him out now? Reply with quote

My son is 14, ADHD/ODD, and dyslexic. he has failed his 8th grade year..or so I have been told by the school at the beginning of his 4th quarter. He has 8 weeks left of school until summer.
MY son, Brand, has pretty much checked out of his classes. He goes to school soley for the social aspect. On a side note, I received notification during his IEP that he's failed, however, he'll be transitioning to public high school anyways. Since when does a child fail and still move on to the next grade?? Thats been an eye opener, for sure.
Brand became very upset and unconsolable just before Spring Break which led me to getting him into the doctor quicky because he said he didn't care anymore about anything and he was just "done". He wrote a class assignment that stated his feelings and that he thought the teacher was stupid and the class was something I'd rather not say on this forum.
This put him in In School Suspension for 2 days and Brand's actions frightened me. His psychologist told him to just "hang loose" and "stay under the radar" the rest of the year and not to worry about missed assignments. OK this didn't sit well with me...hang loose?? stay below the radar?? Since when can a ADHD kid not react to outside stimuli when all of his classes are mainstreamed with 30+ kids and a teacher barking out multiple assignments??? There is no way he can "hang loose". Mad
So, I emailed with a member of my local forum and she asked me why not take him out of school now and let him relax? Afterall he's failed the year and I am going to HS him anyways....
I feel like he should finish out the year, but for his own sanity, I think maybe I should just follow her suggestion and pull him out this Friday when he sees the psychiatrist.
Has anyone else pulled their child this close to the end of the year???
I wold certainly appreciate opinions.
Thanks!!
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Barbie
"momma" to Brandon; 14 and two pups, Bugsy 6 and Milo 4 mos!
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4given
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Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 735
Location: S.Indiana

PostPosted: Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

If it was my son... I would ABSOLUTELY withdraw him now.
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vmsgirl71
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Joined: 14 Apr 2009
Posts: 25
Location: Waterford, MI

PostPosted: Wed Apr 15, 2009 9:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

4given wrote:
If it was my son... I would ABSOLUTELY withdraw him now.


You know, I wrote this after work lastnight (I work the afternoon shift).
Upon reading it this a.m. I thought to myself, what was I thinking?? By all means I am going to pull him out. I have this feeling that his psychiatrist is going to suggest some kind of anti anxiety med or anti depressant in addition to his ADHD meds...and seriously, I don't think he needs them; the "anti's", I mean.
You know what really ticked me off yesterday??? His spec ed team leader sent me an email asking me to attend meetings that I have told her multiple times that I cannot attend. I am available all day long and during everyones lunch and conference times so we usually utilize that, but not her. She also stated that she was unaware of my sons diagnosis?? Oh my word!! She's the person who coordinates his IEP!! I just sat there, mouth open, wondering if she is paying attention to ANY of her spec ed students???? Shocked
Due to this? You can bet your sweet bippy I am removing him after his doc visit Friday. Cool
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Barbie
"momma" to Brandon; 14 and two pups, Bugsy 6 and Milo 4 mos!
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sartasd
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Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Posts: 52

PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2009 1:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If I knew what I know now about IEP and my rights: I would have stood my ground on some issues regarding my deaf/HOH son. (HOH is hard of hearing)

1: I would have insisted that he be placed in the grade he needed to be in not based on his age.
2: I would have been more active in communication with his teachers.
3: I would have called for IEP reviews 2 times a year.
4: I would have insisted in more tutoring or other needs as they happened.
5: I would have insisted in him being retained in the grade if he didn't "pass"

You can insist that they retain him in 8th grade, if you don't want to homeschool.

I homeschooled my son from K to 3rd grade and then moved to live near the state's residential school for the deaf so he didn't have to live in a dorm 5 days a week and be home only on the weekend.

They recommended 4th grade (when I knew he was really 3rd grade in his abilities) 4th grade was great, he had one of the best teachers that year. 5th grade was not so good, actually it wasn't till the end of the year that I found out that they played more than learned that year! Crying or Very sad Mad

This past year he was in 6th grade at the deaf school till Nov. I pulled him and his sister out and placed them in the local PS.

Both struggled till I pulled both out in March. We have spent the March and April and part of May deschooling. This week we begin our new curriculum. They are excited about their new books and ready to learn and study.

There is no reason that a child has to graduate at age 17 or 18. All Special Ed. students by law can remain in school till age 22. My 6th grade son is far behind in his work. Last week we did placement tests and He is 3 grades behind! My dd is 7 and she has many gaps in 1st grade. I'm retaining her in 1st grade and doing 1st grade with her again.


I highly recommend homeschooling, esp. special needs kids. Learning at home would help alot with removing distractions and noices. Plus homeschooling allows each child to go at their pace instead of having to keep up or slow down to the pace of a classroom full of kids.
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Sharon
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Theodore
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Joined: 06 Oct 2005
Posts: 2122
Location: Missouri, US

PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 12:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ADHD is usually just massive boredom combined with a lot of energy. One solution I've heard is to just have your kids run around the building a few times before doing homework, but you also need to reduce the boredom aspect somewhat by not forcing them to sit still for 7 hours. One advantage of homeschooling is you can do in 2 or 3 hours what the school does in 7 - no wasted time sitting there listening to inane questions from other children Smile

I'd probably have gone a bit nuts.
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