Homeschool World Forums     Home     Mall     Catalog     Articles     Contests     Events     Groups     Forum     Contact  
Homeschool World Forum Forum Index Homeschool World Forum
Read thousands of forum posts on topics such as homeschool law, getting started, curriculum, special needs, homeschool vs public school, and much, much more!
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

Why I am against Homeschooling
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 14, 15, 16
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Homeschool World Forum Forum Index -> Homeschool vs Public School
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Profesora H
User


Joined: 02 Apr 2012
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 1:55 pm    Post subject: One size fits all- doesn't Reply with quote

I homeschooled my 4 kids for 7 years. One by one they requested to go to school. As I had lost the desire to be at home full time, I allowed them to enroll. I returned to work, eventually ending up as a public school teacher. Here is my nickel's worth:
One size does NOT fit all. People and circumstances change. Good things can come from many different experiences. I learned a lot from homeschooling. I had time for personal and spiritual development. I made more memories with my kids. When my kids went to school, they never quite bought into the whole peer-influenced thing (except one, who NOW agrees it was negative).

Now I see kids flourishing and kids floundering in my highly-ranked public school. For some, it is a happy and fulfilling thing. They keep a good relationship with their families, grow appropriately, and have lots of friends. For others, it is a sad, lonely place, or they are not able to keep up with the work, or they make negative friends.

Each family must make this decision individually. An emotionally weak parent is NOT going to be a good homeschooler. A depressed mom can do more harm than a depressed teacher. But if you have access to a good support system, and believe God equips the called, it can be a great thing.
_________________
If you aren't part of the solution, you're part of the problem.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
pamom1980
User


Joined: 02 May 2012
Posts: 7
Location: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 8:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I chose to pull my children out of public school once they finished this most recent year. My decision to do so was not taken lightly. My husband and I thought about it for quite a long time before we actually did it. Each year that passed, my oldest struggled more and more. He had issues where some teachers just didn't like him and/or didn't know how to handle him, serious learning issues causing him to just not want to even try, and then of course being bullied at school just because he acted differently than others.

Then my other son began to slowly have problems in school as well. I'm not saying that the public school system is bad, but my children were not doing well with it. All three of my children were struggling for one reason or another. We chose to pull them out because we felt that they'd do better if they were homeschooled. With the kids being home and us teaching them, my children will get the needed one on one time that they were missing at the public school.

I don't know that we'll do it through their high school years, but for now-- it was the best choice for us and one that I am glad we've made.

One thing we just recently learned since deciding to homeschool: My oldest has been having such a difficult time in school with math. I always thought he knew the material and was just being stubborn.. He never wanted to do the math and he'd give the teachers problems. I thought it was partly a result from his having ADHD/OCD but what I found out was that it wasn't because he was being stubborn or due to his ADHD/OCD. Instead, I tested him and while he is now in the 7th grade, his math skills were back at around a 4th grade level. He wasn't being stubborn but he just didn't understand it. Teachers would call my husband and I in for conferences and tell us how stubborn he was being or that he was refusing to do work. They never once wanted to work with us and try to find out the source of his frustrations or WHY he was struggling. They were too quick to place blame on us as his parents and asked us what was going on at home for him to behave the way he was.

Anyway.. my point is.. A parent's decision to homeschool their child(ren) is their right and their choice. It is legal in every state and as a parent, we just want our children to grow up with a decent education and to be treated like any other child. Seeing them come home crying from being bullied is awful. My boys are in the Boy Scouts and my daughter is in the Girl Scouts. They go to the library for different activities, the playgrounds, the zoo, playgroups, etc... They will socialize and have fun. Yes, they're playing with others who are homeschooled but also get to play with other children as well. I don't think that I'm limiting my children on their socialization. I think that I'm helping them avoid the peers that would have a negative impact on them. I know that they can't avoid the "troublemakers" and I know that they have to experience life like any other child. My choice to homeschool them was out of love.

I'm sorry that the original poster had a negative experience with homeschooling but not everyone will have the same experience. I know many people that were homeschooled their entire childhood and have tons of friends both homeschooled and not. There are a lot of deciding factors that go into why parents decide to homeschool as well as how a person will grow up and how they will socialize.

I'm not trying to make anyone upset with anything I've said but just stating my own opinions...
_________________
Living life one day at a time
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
DU)_CORE
User


Joined: 17 Dec 2012
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 12:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The real reason we homeschool has been summed up pretty good in the original post to this thread.....and that reason is "closed minded-ness."

Homeschooled children seem to have a much more open mind imho. I see that in my own kids and with the responses to the opening post.

For the OP it's their way or the highway but the responses I see mainly recommend to do what works best, every child is different, every school is different, every teacher is different. The OP, in their "government school" way of thinking, is unable to see that. That's the biggest difference between home school vs government school.

Social skills are a non-issue UNLESS the parents have "issues" themselves.
My children are more socially advanced than any government schooler, not because there is anything wrong with those schools, but because we as parents are social people.

When many of our friends public schooled children need/want a play-date, they request to play with our children.

Again, do what is best for your children. Unfortunately, many folks cannot because their hand is forced by the mighty dollar in that they've over-extended themselves trying to keep up with the Jones and now both parents must work or hold down several jobs.

Sometimes other issues get in the way that are legitimate.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
hillbillywoman
User


Joined: 15 Sep 2013
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Mon Sep 16, 2013 11:26 pm    Post subject: Socialization and the Public School System Reply with quote

"Socialization" was the main reason my husband and I pulled our 7th grade daughter OUT of the public school system! We did not like the person she was becoming. Our formerly sweet, obedient, and loving child was becoming hateful, sassy, rebellious, disobedient, etc. She had begun to act embarrassed to be seen in public with her family. In addition to that, her grades had dropped from all A's in primary school, to C's in middle school. Also, she was being verbally (sexually) harassed by a male classmate. The principal and school counselor told me that nothing could be done about it unless the boy "actually did something" physically to her. Well, we weren't about to let it get to that point! So, we pulled her out of public school.

She did not want to be homeschooled. She resented us for it the whole time she was being homeschooled. She even declared that we were "ruining" her life! But, we knew it was for her own good. We didn't let her attitude sway us. As it turned out, she calmed down and became tolerable to live with. Her grades improved, and she ended up graduating one year ahead of her public school peers. She enrolled in college and did not have to take any remedial courses after graduating from homeschooling. She had no trouble gaining employment, and worked from the time she was 16. Her last job was bookkeeper in one of our local banks. She is now married and a stay-at-home mom of three kids. Guess who's educating her children? I AM!!! By HER own choice! I guess she no longer thinks that we ruined her life, huh?
_________________
Why have children if you are going to turn them over to the government to raise?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Jlynn1982
User


Joined: 09 Jan 2014
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 1:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think home school has pro and cons just like anything in life. I went to a small public school. But I knew several people that were home schooled. In my experience most of the people I knew but not all, were very sheltered in a negative way, then became very wild as an adult. One I knew that I knew was home schooled her entire life up until college, we were friends, but one thing thought was odd about her HS was her mom left her home alone ( she is an only child) and taught at the public school that I went to. I think thats wrong. Home school is great for some and it has work at well for some but I think its wrong to leave a child home alone with a list of assignments to get done by the time you get home. If you choose to home school, stay home and do it right. I think though my friends case is very rare. I hope my comments have not offended anyone, I think home school can turn out well I have seen good and bad in both cases.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
elliemaejune
User


Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 577
Location: The Fireswamp

PostPosted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 7:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jlynn1982 wrote:
I think home school has pro and cons just like anything in life. I went to a small public school. But I knew several people that were home schooled. In my experience most of the people I knew but not all, were very sheltered in a negative way, then became very wild as an adult. One I knew that I knew was home schooled her entire life up until college, we were friends, but one thing thought was odd about her HS was her mom left her home alone ( she is an only child) and taught at the public school that I went to. I think thats wrong. Home school is great for some and it has work at well for some but I think its wrong to leave a child home alone with a list of assignments to get done by the time you get home. If you choose to home school, stay home and do it right. I think though my friends case is very rare. I hope my comments have not offended anyone, I think home school can turn out well I have seen good and bad in both cases.


Oh, yes, your friend's case was very rare. And very sad. Sad
_________________
Married to Mr. Ellie for over 30 years
Mother to 2 dds and 2 dsil
Grandmother to 1 sweet boy
Caretaker of 2 dear kitties, 1 French bulldog, 1 dachsund, and 3 budgies
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Jakk
User


Joined: 28 Jun 2010
Posts: 15

PostPosted: Tue Jan 28, 2014 12:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

nickklein wrote:
The funny thing to this debate is that homeschooling or public schooling shouldn't be performed because a few people say it's good/bad. It really depends on the individuals specific needs and wants.

The socialization problem that seems to pop up frequently into this post is not because of the type of schooling but how much exposure to other human beings there is. Without regular human contact a child can't be expected to naturally be good at socializing with others. In one way I do think public schools are more beneficial in the socialization aspect to your children, however with homeschooling it really depends on how much effort you put into it. Going to sporting events, church groups, doing volunteer work, public places such as parks, etc all assist in the development of your child's social ability.

Thus, social ability must be worked for and will not just naturally come from nowhere. This is why it is impossible to determine which schooling system works best because it all depends on the effort put into it.


We started homeschooling after seeing the "socialization" our kids got in the public school. No thank you. Being in a brick and mortar school does not mean your child's socialization will be a positive thing.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Alicelewis11
User


Joined: 13 Mar 2014
Posts: 15

PostPosted: Tue Mar 25, 2014 3:06 am    Post subject: Re: Why I am against Homeschooling Reply with quote

Theodore wrote:
Why is removing your kids from public school permanently a problem? The reason for removing them is not just going to disappear if you wait a year or two, and given the academic and scheduling advantages of homeschooling, there's no reason to go back. Also, public schools have a tendency to stick rigidly to the grade system, and often hold you back a grade when you try to reapply instead of putting you in the grade where you belong. We get messages about this also.

Quote:
If that is all of the activities which your siblings have ever participated in, you just proved my point as well as I could have.


Those were just the activities that came quickly to mind. We've also gone to homeschooling and juggling conventions, and TeenPact, and there's probably several other activities I'm forgetting. If you don't approve of our list of extracurriculars, that's because they were picked for our enjoyment, not yours. see
Math Practice Worksheets
Quote:
I would be very interested in how that study was conducted. Was the source parents or a neutral third party?


The source was homeschool families (5,402 homeschool students from 1,657 families). All the socialization choices were objective, not subjective, so it doesn't really matter whether the parents or a disinterested third party answered them.

http://www.hslda.org/docs/study/ray1997/02.asp

Quote:
As far as "Play with People Outside the Family" (the only one that I'm really worried about; homeschoolers usually educate fine) - how many of those other activities are counted as "playing"?


None of them, I would guess. Most of my siblings go over to friends' houses quite regularly, and we have a number of public schooled friends from Civil Air Patrol and other activities. I'd view playing as separate from the other items on the list.

Quote:
Aside from being a gross generalization about public school kids...


It was meant to be a gross generalization.

Quote:
...that statement succeeded in illuminating a logical fallacy that I've heard a lot. Is success later in life a big enough reward that it's worth having a childhood that sucked?


Well, depends on your point of view. If you have 16 years of childhood, and live to be the average age of 76, do the 60 years that came after outweigh the 16 that came before? What about the fact that your children and family are likely to be better off and more stable? Also, what are the alternatives? If your two choices are to be miserable in public school or to be less miserable at home (assuming you're miserable at all - we certainly aren't), then the latter is always going to be the better choice. And like I keep saying, there's no reason why you can't have a social life as a homeschooler. Homeschooling saves a huge amount of time, since your teacher is more available and you don't have to transit back and forth, and the extra time is available for activities you enjoy - or a part-time job, if you need to earn some money.

Quote:
And before you point out how happy all the homeschoolers are, why did you bring that point up in the first place if all the homeschoolers are happy? Offering success as the carrot for a very nasty stick is a trick used by helicopter parents everywhere.


All choices have both costs and benefits. This was another item on the benefit side of things. Your particular situation decides whether the costs outweigh the benefits.

Quote:
My high school has 1238 kids. I'll have to look up the national ranking (do you know where I could find that? Google was not helpful.)


No, but the high school probably knows.

I think Home schools are all different, some go well, some don't. Some public schools are fine, some are terrible. Some kids loved their hs experience, some, like this person, hated it. There are so many variables involved. We have no idea what this person's family life was like, but I know for my children, I want them to desire their family more than their friends. I want home to be the most fun place they can be! That's why I homeschool-to raise them up in the fear and admontion of the Lord, to pass on His mighty deeds to the next generation. To delight in my children and see them delight in the loving God we serve. And that's my personal choice. But I don't pick on my friends who choose to keep their children in the public school.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Homeschool World Forum Forum Index -> Homeschool vs Public School All times are GMT - 6 Hours (CST)
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 14, 15, 16
Page 16 of 16

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group

Homeschool World Terms of Use  •  Privacy Policy  •  Copyright ©1993-Now Home Life, Inc.