Need advice about sending my children to school, PLEASE!
Our typical day is very unorganized. I usually get out of bed around 8:30 feeling like I haven't slept a wink since the baby was up about 6 times and was also in bed with me. I try to meal plan, but we usually run out of things and we have only one car which is usually being used by my husband. So breakfast is sometimes late, then the baby needs me for whatever reason until about 10. He usually naps then for about 30 mins. When he is down, we run downstairs to start school and usually only complete one lesson. At that time, we have to break, so I can get the baby. I bring him downstairs and hold him while we attempt to start a new lesson, which is usually interrupted by him screaming or getting into things. By this time, it's time to start lunch, which some days can be around 2:00! At this point the house hasn't been touched cleaning wise and the baby needs another nap. If he goes down for a nap, I try to do the dishes and get some laundry done, then figure out what is going to be for dinner. We try to do our outings at this time of day, then my hope is always to get home and finish the rest of the planned school day. So far, that plan has never worked. We may end up having dinner at 8:00 some days due to time schedules conflicting. Our boys are in bed usually by 8:30. Most days, naps are not taken, which they still need, and school has not been completed. We started in September, and so far we took off half of November and all of December due to 2 rounds of illness in the whole family.
The stress of the baby, lack of sleep and other things have made this time very hard for me to cope. I am usually not very pleasant and very impatient with the older boys. It has caused me to act harshly with them and I can't seem to find peace and happiness in my life because the stress is never ending and the help is not there. We do not have anyone else to help except for my MIL who just had chemo and back surgery.
We are not financially in a position to hire a baby sitter. Lately I am considering putting the older boys in a Montessori school that is just up the road from us. I have never considered sending my children anywhere and I have the conviction of raising them and teaching them. We have always decided to homeschool and the thought of sending them somewhere for most of the day is not at all ideal to us. BUT, at this point, I'm wondering if that would be better for them. I am just not able to keep up and give them the attention and time that they desperately need. We are starting to see signs of this in our oldest boy. He daydreams so much that he is starting to exhibit very strange behaviors because his mind need to be stimulated. I am really struggling with what to do, and my husband has more than once made the suggestion of doing it until I can manage.
Does anyone have any advice in regards to this, or have any of you been had to do this for the good of your children? Any help or encouragement would be grateful!!