Anyone leading a HS group.....

Discuss unschooling, eclectic, the unit study approach, or any other "unusual" homeschooling method.

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hsklass
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Anyone leading a HS group.....

Postby hsklass » Sun Feb 18, 2007 9:20 pm

I would love some comments on practical ways to lead a HS group.
I started one about 1 year ago and we have had so many bumps in the road I am ready to throw in the towel.

How do you stay motivated to do what you do?

Most of the families in our group are great - but as always there are a select few who are negative and questioning about every little thing.

Thanks

Ramona
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Re: Anyone leading a HS group.....

Postby Ramona » Mon Feb 19, 2007 4:12 pm

I did it for a few years when we lived elsewhere.

What specific sorts of bumps in the road have you had?

When no one wanted to take any responsibility, I just did it all my own way.

When moms didn't come to my moms' night, I started having daytime activities for the kids instead.

When I never got more than 3 families out to any one activity, I just kept on going and adjusted my expectations: if one family showed up, that was a success! (I also kept on advertising to everybody who showed any slight interest at all.)

When people complained I stopped trying to please all the people all the time and just planned things that I wanted my kids to do.

Best to you,
Ramona

hsklass
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Postby hsklass » Mon Feb 19, 2007 4:31 pm

Bumps.....

Mostly complaining about the rules we have.
Which are very normal - such as closed activities and you have to be a member to hold an office.

When I came here there was not a group - so I started one.
Now it has become so annoying to hear all of the complaining that
I just want to stop.

I started this so that my kids would have a group to be part of.
And so that I would have support.

I think the rules we have are good and good for the group, but I also do not want to offend people. I was planning to relax one of our rules - but don't know if I should.

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Theodore
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Postby Theodore » Mon Feb 19, 2007 6:15 pm

Do you make the rules yourself or does the group vote on them?

hsklass
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Postby hsklass » Mon Feb 19, 2007 6:44 pm

When I started the group I took the rules from the last 4 groups and picked out the three main rules used to govern those groups.
(My family moves allot with my husbands job.)

So when everyone signed the registration form and paid the
membership fee they agreed to these rules.

I was on the board in 2 of these groups and those groups did not have these problems.

It is only 2 Moms out of the 20 families - so I am unsure how to resolve this.
The main problem they have is that they are unable to bring whoever, whenever to all the activities that we have.
What is the point in a support group that requires a membership if anyone can attend everything you have?

momo3boys
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Postby momo3boys » Wed Feb 21, 2007 9:17 am

We are a very loose group. Anyone can come, we don't have a board, we don't have membership fees. Everyone pitches in and does what they are good at, one person designed the website, one person organizes some of the field trips, etc.. we all work together and that is how i want my children that learn how to do things, as a community.
Phi 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

hsklass
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Postby hsklass » Wed Feb 21, 2007 1:48 pm

That is wonderful!

I have noticed over my nearly decade of Homeschooling that groups (with and without written rules) tend to take on a personality of those in the group.
I think I have to come to the realization one last time that not everyone is going to like every group and that this group is not for everyone.

I like order and to know what to expect.
Rules help accomplish that.
I have always been in leadership roles in life - and enjoyed them for the most part. I like people and like to organize things that help others to succeed at Homeschooling or whatever else it happens to be.
This experience has certainly taught me to be even more helpful and encouraging to those in charge - no matter the situation.

I like for my children to work in the community for common goals but to also know that there are rules that govern everything we do - some written, some unwritten.

There is nothing wrong with either approach to it and that is the wonderful thing about Homeschooling in America, if this group doesn't fit your family there will be one that does.

StellarStory
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Postby StellarStory » Tue Jul 17, 2007 11:08 pm

I'm in the process of seeing if there is any interest in a couple of home schooling clubs my kids would like to have in their interests.

I tend to be pretty easy going. My one main rule is treat everyone and everything with respect and expect that respect back.

No dues will be involved.

I do know from being a Girl Scout leader that one kid and one mom who are a pain can spoil a group for the others. You would think that's true would you but they can really ruin the good vibes.

In Girl Scouts you can't let a Girl go either. I had some serious stress issues for about three years with those two individuals. Of course you hope you can help them find a way to behave more reasonably but that doesn't always happen.

In polite society you seldom want to say, "Hey you are driving everyone nuts with this behavior." We all want to be "nice." I think perhaps society might be better off sometimes if we were a little more upfront about what really is distracting and negative to the rest of the group.

It's a real downer when you have a situation like that.

This is why people love to have someone ELSE be the leader. LOL.

RavenC
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Postby RavenC » Sun Aug 19, 2007 8:47 am

Is there any possibility that the complainers would like a role with some leadership responsibilities? Maybe if they had to plan an activity for everyone, they'd realize that it's actually work? Or maybe you'd find someone who finally felt needed and turn out to be a great asset to you. Or maybe they'll sit down and be quiet from now on, for fear that you'll ask them to do something else! Just make sure that everyone knows that they're the ones who are responsible so the credit/blame goes to the right folks.
Home schooling a high schooler...any suggestions?

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elliemaejune
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Postby elliemaejune » Tue Aug 21, 2007 10:30 pm

hsklass wrote:Bumps.....

Mostly complaining about the rules we have.
Which are very normal - such as closed activities and you have to be a member to hold an office.

When I came here there was not a group - so I started one.
Now it has become so annoying to hear all of the complaining that
I just want to stop.

I started this so that my kids would have a group to be part of.
And so that I would have support.

I think the rules we have are good and good for the group, but I also do not want to offend people. I was planning to relax one of our rules - but don't know if I should.


Well, here's the thing:

If these women knew the rules when they joined, and they joined anyway, well then, that's their problem, isn't it?

Here's a true thing: Leaders will always offend *someone* in the group. It is unavoidable. You might need to just set your face like flint and refuse to let these women complain. They do it because they get away with it (hey--sounds just like children!) and if they are told that they are welcome to leave the group if they are not happy, they will probably either quit complaining or leave. In either case, your problem will be solved, yes?

I never belonged to a group which had actual officers, or even an official membership, but if you're going to have officers, it sure seems to me that those officers should be members.

I'm a little fuzzy on what you mean by "closed activities."


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