Tremendous hostility over homeschooling

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Sunnymom
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Postby Sunnymom » Sat Jul 14, 2007 7:26 am

I would venture to ask how many of the children seem to be average when they really are top achievers. I mean, when I was in school, I could read the entire textbook in a few weeks and be bored to tears the rest of the year if I did not just slow down to their speed, so why bother being anything more than average?


Ditto that- If I heard "You aren't fulfilling your potential" once, I heard it a thousand times. But how was I supposed to fulfill my 'potential' when the basketball coach/science teacher hardly showed up for class? :roll:

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seekingmyLord
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Postby seekingmyLord » Sat Jul 14, 2007 7:29 am

Lily wrote:Quite honestly, yes, I think these two people were this way because of homeschooling. They were isolated and cut off for much of their childhood, they missed many opportunities and lessons that other children got. Two families, both homeschooled, both producing very strange results. It was a very select career field, but the only two with these problems were homeschooled from birth through high school. Talking to them and finding out more about their childhood led me to believe that this was one of the worst things a person could do to a child.

It is intellectually dishonest to say that there is no base whatsoever for stereotypes. Understanding them is the first step to overcoming them, right?

I met one family of homeschoolers long ago who was a concern to me. There were three girls and one boy, all adopted from abusive families. The adoptive mother was dying of cancer and the adoptive father was bi-polar. These children, one was 16 years old, were not socially "normal." Who would expect them to be?

I think there are some people who chose to homeschool because they are not comfortable with society norms and that their children would be just as unconventional in that way regardless of where they went to be educated. Although they may have more opportunity to socialize differently in a public school setting, that does not mean they would or that it would not even be worse for them there.
Last edited by seekingmyLord on Sat Jul 14, 2007 9:13 am, edited 1 time in total.

Sunnymom
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Postby Sunnymom » Sat Jul 14, 2007 7:31 am

Since which brand of toothpaste you use or where you eat your hamburgers does little to affect your child's future, I don't think people get bent out of shape too much, but to even insinuate that they may not be doing the best they can for their children gets people's undies in quite a bunch - even if the insinuation is all in their minds. Many people who are hostile toward homeschooling are not secure in the own decisions they've made for their kids because they aren't willing to put forth the effort, can't sacriface the second income due to their chosen lifestyle, etc. - especially given the number of times I've heard the "homeschooling gives your child an unfair advantage" arguement.


Gotta ditto this too. I know that most folks don't equate brand usage with the weightier matters of a child's future, but IMO it is no more their business what method(s) I use to educate my child than whether I am wearing Fruit of the Loom or Hanes.

To prove this, all you gotta do is pay attention, as has been mentioned, to what people say when they find out you homeschool. They give reasons and excuses and even attack your choice... uhm, did any of you EVER ASK FOR THEIR OPINION OR ADVICE? I bet not- but for some reason folks feel that they must critique your choice, when they wouldn't dream of doing so about other things you do with your kids. Why do they think this issue is some kind of license to be nosy and rude?
Since homeschooling does take a fair amount of time and effort, many people do not want to take that time and effort to homeschool their kids, especially dual income families who have to fork out extra cash for someone to watch their young child when the public school system will do it for free for the majority of the day. Seriously, these are some of the justifications I've heard from people. It's sad, but many people aren't willing to make the sacrifaces it takes to homeschool, especially in these days when the "keeping up with the Joneses" attitude is so prominent. You cannot sacriface one income when you have a house you can't afford and two car payments you shouldn't have.


'Nuff said. ;)

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Postby Calla_Dragon » Sat Jul 14, 2007 7:38 am

Gotta ditto this too. I know that most folks don't equate brand usage with the weightier matters of a child's future, but IMO it is no more their business what method(s) I use to educate my child than whether I am wearing Fruit of the Loom or Hanes.


No, it's not, but people have a proven track record of sticking their noses where it doesn't belong and I think people are eager to "prove" to others that they are doing what is best for their child.
To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent.

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seekingmyLord
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Postby seekingmyLord » Sat Jul 14, 2007 8:23 am

Since which brand of toothpaste you use or where you eat your hamburgers does little to affect your child's future, I don't think people get bent out of shape too much, but to even insinuate that they may not be doing the best they can for their children gets people's undies in quite a bunch - even if the insinuation is all in their minds.

Not to derail this topic, but coming from an organic foods minded person, people most definitely get bent out of shape about that, too. Just because we eat organics, we must be insinuating that they are not doing the best they can for the health of their children. I am using this to prove a point...

I have come to believe that if I do anything unconventional that people see me as someone who thinks I am better than they or that I am weird or that I insinuate that they are not caring or whatever rationalization people need to make me inferior by comparison to themselves in their minds... and to be quite honest, we all do it. If we don't feel good about what we are doing, we probably would not be doing it and we know that we constantly make comparisons, if we are being honest.

However, public school is not a choice, not a decision made based on information! It just is something people do because it is just the thing to do. When parents talk about registering their child in pre-K or kindergarten, it is rare to fine one that actually did some research on the schools in the area and then chose a public school. We have school of choice where we are and it is still rare!
Last edited by seekingmyLord on Sat Jul 14, 2007 9:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Come to think of it..

Postby Sunnymom » Sat Jul 14, 2007 8:46 am

Not to derail this topic, but coming from an organic foods minded person, people most definitely get bent out of shape about that, too. Just because we eat organics, we must be insinuating that they are not doing the best they can for the health of their children. I am using this to prove a point...


This is true. I am very conscious of being modest and lady-like, so I tend to wear dresses ALOT. This irks my mother-in-law tremendously- she thinks it is a condemnation of her wearing pants and shorts, even though I have never said a single word about her clothing, except when she is wearing something short and crosses her ankle over her knee, giving all and sundry a wide angle view of Nebraska, KWIM? But I have never said that she shouldn't wear shorts or pants, she just assumes that I think less of her for the way she dresses.

This is just weird to me. I care about how my behavior affects people, whether or not I am a help and honoring God by how I live my life, but on the other hand, I don't give a rip what people think of my choices in life- am I making sense here?


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