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Homeschool World Forum
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Terica Bergin User
Joined: 18 Aug 2006 Posts: 2 Location: mid missouri
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Posted: Sat Aug 19, 2006 7:39 am Post subject: worried newbie |
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| hello, this is my first year homeschooling. my 12 year old son and 9 year old daughter have been in both privet and public school from the beginning. since the third grade my son has had problems, i've been told hes add, adhd, ld, and all kind of other labels. i've meet with teachers, counselors, principles, and pediatricians and nobody said how to help him other than putting him on drugs, to witch i said no.any way, after lots of prayer and research i have decided to home school. now my real problem is his father. we've been divorced for 8 years and we both have remarried. he has never taken an active role in our children education but now that i said i'm home schooling them he is threatening to take them from me because they will grow up to be social misfits. there is so much more to this story and i'm very worried. i could really use some kind words from someone please. thank you |
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Theodore Moderator

Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Posts: 1994 Location: Missouri, US
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Posted: Sat Aug 19, 2006 11:56 am Post subject: Re: worried newbie |
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Missouri has good homeschooling structure, with three state groups and numerous smaller groups:
http://www.home-school.com/groups/MO.html
You should be able to find enough homeschoolers near you for social activities, and even if you can't, there ae numerous other options. Swim team, Boy / Girl Scouts, Civil Air Patrol, martial arts, assorted team sports (you can probably participate in sports at the local high school without being enrolled as a student), church activities, etc. Educating at home does not mean you'll be locking your children in the basement.
As for your son having problems, some children just can't sit still or pay attention in school, either because they have too much energy, or because the classes bore them, or because they're hands-on learners and the classes are all visual / auditory. I'm sure there sn't anything physically wrong with your son, he just doesn't adapt well to the school environment.
I don't think it will be easy for the father to get custody after all this time and solely on the basis of you wanting to homeschool your son. That would be equivalent to saying that homeschooling is inferior to public schooling, which would be discrimination against homeschoolers. You should probably join Home School Legal Defense Association, however, just to make sure. _________________ The Farming Game - Software Edition for PC, Mac, Linux
The board game has sold over 350,000 copies worldwide, garnered many awards, is used by over 2,000 schools, and is used extensively by homeschoolers. |
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AnnetteR User
Joined: 30 Jul 2006 Posts: 39 Location: Minnesota
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Posted: Tue Aug 22, 2006 2:07 pm Post subject: |
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This mornings news included a story about how some schools are going online and more and more students are schooling from home. Homeschooling is not so far off from online schooling. I highly doubt that your ex-husband could use the issue of homeschooling as leverage to take custody of the children.
I'll say it a thousand times, schooling has little to do with socialization. It provides an opportunity to socialize but school doesn't teach socialization. There are many great places and opportunities for socialization beginning with a local park (we have an outdoor skateboard park in my area), local community centers - ours offers team sports, martial arts, and more, and local homeschool groups. The park district is another source you might want to check into for activities - ours has activities for kids of all ages, including special activities for homeschoolers.
The only leverage your ex-husband may have is your sons diagnoses. I would be sure to find a program/support group in your area that can help you deal with issues involving your son. Though the majority may feel that drugs are the answer there are very likely other parents out there that feel as you do.
Good luck and I wish you all the best. |
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Forever User
Joined: 14 Nov 2005 Posts: 8 Location: Calgary, Alberta, CANADA
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Posted: Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:36 pm Post subject: |
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I too decided to homeschool our son priscely for the same reasons you had ! I will NOT EVER put my son on drugs. Are you kidding? Here we tell them NOT TO DO DRUGS and then oh, well maybe you're not paying attention enough take these drugs...I don't think so.
You are doing the right thing. YOU are the responsible one. Tell your ex to get a life! _________________ Forever Home School |
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Forever User
Joined: 14 Nov 2005 Posts: 8 Location: Calgary, Alberta, CANADA
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Posted: Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:37 pm Post subject: |
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By the way - I started when my son was 12 as well! A perfect age to start. _________________ Forever Home School |
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Terica Bergin User
Joined: 18 Aug 2006 Posts: 2 Location: mid missouri
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Posted: Fri Aug 25, 2006 3:43 pm Post subject: |
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Thank you for all the encouragement.
We have joined a local support group and gratefully I have the support of my family. My ex has calmed a little about the idea. He asked the kids to stay with him and they said they wanted to stay with me and they wanted to home school. I find it amusing that they don't want to stay at their dads were they have tvs, xbox, play station, and game cubes in their rooms with unlimited amounts of time to play. Here they don't have that, we don't have a game station of any kind and we limit our tv time to minimal. Also at our house they have chores and we don't eat fast food or a lot of store bought junk. Go figure.
So we have started our school year and having fun too. i look forward to seeing them grow. I'll keep praying to see the way. Thank you again.
Terica |
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momo3boys User
Joined: 14 Feb 2006 Posts: 574 Location: Western Mass
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Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 7:41 am Post subject: |
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Good for you When times get rough, and days are long. remember that you chose what is in their best interest, and they will love you for it, ever the more!  _________________ Phi 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. |
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AnnetteR User
Joined: 30 Jul 2006 Posts: 39 Location: Minnesota
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Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:35 pm Post subject: |
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| Terica Bergin wrote: |
I find it amusing that they don't want to stay at their dads were they have tvs, xbox, play station, and game cubes in their rooms with unlimited amounts of time to play. Here they don't have that, we don't have a game station of any kind and we limit our tv time to minimal. Also at our house they have chores and we don't eat fast food or a lot of store bought junk. Go figure.
So we have started our school year and having fun too. i look forward to seeing them grow. I'll keep praying to see the way. Thank you again.
Terica |
Thank you for the update. I'm glad things have calmed and are going well.
I think some kids feel more comfortable with limits and expectations. Being able to play games all day and being allowed to eat junk may actually make them feel like no one is paying attention to them or that no one is really looking out for them. |
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