When to pull from public school

[Jennywrites]

I'm new to the forum, and was hoping on some input on our situation. We homeschooled by eldest son through kindergarten, then we moved to WA state and he went to public kindergarten here (different age cut off from our former district). He thrived in both kindergarten and 1rst grade, in fact, I still adore his 1rst grade teacher. He had a rough start in kindergarten, a lot of issues with him being ahead of his class in reading and getting bored, which would cause him to wander off to do his own thing. His first grade teacher catered to the fact he was ahead with more advanced versions of the work the rest of the class was working on. Then second grade came around. This year has just been awful. His teacher has pegged him as a 'problem child'. He talks too much, he won't sit still, he works ahead instead of paying attention. There was a bully situation, where a group of four girls were coming up to him and screaming in his ears, telling the rest of the class he smelled and holding their noses whenever they see him, and constantly saying he was chasing them at recess and pinching their rears. I work at the school part time during recess, and he never played near them on the days they complained. Finally the situation was handled only after I made a call to the superintendent after both the teacher and principal told me I was making a big deal out of nothing.

I have 'spied' on the class. Standing outside the door and peeking through the window off and on through the day. All they really do seem to do is worksheets at their desks. The only time I see them moving around is to turn in papers. And don't get me started on what they are reading! Pre-k level books (it says so right on the covers!). He reads them in a day then gets in trouble for working ahead and has to continue reading the same book for the rest of the week. Every day he comes home in tears swearing that he hates school and will forever. He also says he is cursed at school to never make anyone happy. While he is doing his homework, he is just scribbling on the work in class instead of doing it correctly.

The term ends in two weeks and then there is only one more term until summer break. We have done our research and we are prepared to return to homeschooling. We even have a wonderful homeschool campus nearby where he can take a few classes if he wishes, though he will not be able to take advantage of it until the fall.

Do we pull him out now, or have him finish the year? In our state we have a yearly assessment requirement as well, and it would be much easier (for my husband and I at least) to start fresh in the fall instead of trying to pull everything together in a couple of months. I also think it may be easier for him to adjust after having the summer off with everyone else, rather than coming home when all his friends are still in school. He is a very social child and gets lonely very easily. I just don't think 2 weeks is enough time to get all our ducks in a row, make sure we are completely legal, and make a comfortable situation for him at home. My husband and I need to adjust to the idea as well. We will literally be together all the time, as DH works from home as do I (he is a graphic designer, I am a freelance writer). While we love it when our family is together, it will take adjustment to be around each other constantly. It is also still winter here, so cabin fever is very likely.

What would you do? Wait, do it now, or take him out midterm in April or early May? Thank you for any advice.

[ncmom]

[elliemaejune]

And if it were me, I'd take him out. Enough damage done. He doesn't need to spend one more minute in such an ugly environment.

[Jill]

If it were me I'd take him out. I would find out what I HAD to do to be legal for the rest of the year and I wouldn't worry about the rest.

I had some of the same issues that you do. I kept saying, I'll wait 'til Christmas break, then I'll wait 'til Thanksgiving break, then I couldn't stand it and they came out Nov. 1. Looking back it was a good decision to just do it.

[Matt Conrad]

Sounds like a bad situation, but not an immediate crisis. Doesn't sound like he is going to get seriously hurt or hurt anyone else. You didn't say, but I got the idea he's able to have fun and be a happy kid once he's away from school.

Basically, if you don't think he's being "damaged" I think it is OK to wait. You might work toward taking him out at midterms and reassess as you get closer.

If you do keep him in school, maybe you can take a vacation for a week (you can vacation at home), be generous in calling sick days, find appointments to take him out for half days, etc.

[Jennywrites]

Thank you everyone for your responses. He is happy at home most days, though some days he comes home miserable and stays that way. He is also already going to be missing quite a bit of school, so he has even less time to spend there. It is spring break the first week of April, then the last week of April we are going to be in Las Vegas for my sister-in-law's wedding. This has already been approved by the school (sounds crazy, that they have to approve us taking him out for a week, doesn't it?). He is already excused for that week. I am at the school, so I can make sure things don't get too far out of hand. He has 9 weeks left he would actually be attending, and 2 of those are 1/2 day weeks. Also, since I have been working there and they know already I am not coming back next year, it seems we are less likely to deal with any fallout if we pull him during the summer. We will have to say very little, as we are moving out of this school's area and will need to withdraw him regardless.