It turns out that the school wants the boys, both of them mind you, tested for autism. We went home in shock and didn't even know what to think. We both cried and felt terrible. My wife then looked up the diagnostic criteria for autism in the DSM-IV. We then realized that they weren't using the criteria sheet at the meeting, but rather, a sheet about where a 4 year old and a 3 year old were "supposed to be" developmentally.
The speech pathologist doesn't like working with early elementary students, and thus, something else just has to be the problem. They contradicted themselves continuously in the meeting. They talked about how the boys intereacted with others and were empathic, yet, those are traits that are largely devoid in autism. However, when you widen the disease to a "spectrum," then it becomes a catch-all phrase.
Then, get this-a day or two before the meeting, the teacher observed our children at the babysitter's house without our permission! No one informed us of this, not even the babysitter. Their audacity and lack of regard for the rules knows no bounds.
We are debating whether or not to send our kids to a private school or to home school. The latter option is what I'm in favor of and it's what my wife would like to do. It would make things tight at home for money, but we could pull it off. The school has completely and totally lost our trust. We have been very supportive of the school and have even purchased items for the teacher to use in the classroom. I even taught at the school for six years, before opting to teach elsewhere. My wife intends to give her thirty day notice, whereupon, we will pull our kids and do what is best for them. Our only regret is that we were dumb enough to trust them at all.
I have been Homeschooling for 8 years, I run my own group and run a HS library. These problems are heard all to often. I am sorry this happened to you but the only way to stop the problems is to take control of your children's life. I had 2 children in public school. After abuse, neglect and a principal that had no clue where my son was ever I started homeschooling. Make sure you research homeschooling, read books, ask questions and be prepared. Homeschooling is rewarding beyond everything I have ever done. But it is time consuming, sometimes lonely and sometimes frustrating.
Not being able to do a few things on that sheet doesn't equate to autism. 
Second, our children are very affectionate, do engage in imaginative play, and have a wide variety of facial expressions. Lastly, my boys do have language delay issues, which is commonly mistaken for autism. Thomas Sowell has some excellently written