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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 10:53 am
Well, I have 4 sons and I've been pondering something for awhile.
I've heard parents many times describe their sons as "all boy". I've even done it myself a couple times. But, I was immediately bothered by the implications I was making.
Are we inadvertantly suggesting that our sons that prefer to read rather than romp are any less "boy"?
What are your thoughts?
Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 2:42 pm
No, they just don't fit in with the stereotype. Practically speaking, isn't it possible to like both books and outdoors activities at the same time? To be healthy in both mind and body, you can't focus on one to the exclusion of the other.
Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:07 am
I guess I didn't make myself clear. I am not suggesting that outdoor activities have to be forsaken for reading...never came close.
I have four sons...all of which can prove or disprove most common stereotypes for boys. What I want to know from someone with experience is....Are we sewing a seed in the minds of our non-stereotypical boys by pointing at the stereotypical as "all boy". Children's minds process things differently. Are we mistakenly sending the message that he is "less boy"?
Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 11:58 pm
I have 2 sons and a daughter and at times I have described my older son as "all boy" but I think that it is more of an attitude that he had more than his actions. He loves to read and designs web pages on the side for people. He is not an outdoorsy type. In fact, I have to make him go outside. He would much rather be in his room on the computer or reading and if he can't do that then he likes to watch the History channel or (believe it or not) he loves to help take care of his 2 month old brother. He has his (what we would call)"all boy" moments, for instance, he is 13 and loves to "check out" the girls when we are out and he loves sports cars and watching football with his dad. I also think that what we classify as all boy or all girl changes by their age. When they are toddlers we consider all boy rough housing and playing in the dirt and all girl as playing house and loving on the baby doll,as they grow up that changes with their age. So I really don't think it affects them in the long run. As far as kids are concerned I personally don't think they care if you think they are all boy or all girl or not as long as they are having fun and enjoying what they are doing.
As far as what we teach them my son learns what his sister is learning and vice versa for her. If we are doing cooking or sewing he is doing it too and for my daughter...if we are learning about car engines so is she. I really think that people put to much emphasis on what is boy and what is girl. But these are just my thoughts on it.